Mormon Oral Sex





No Oral Sex for Faithful Married Mormons

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mormon sex"The First Presidency has interpreted oral sex as constituting an unnatural, impure, or unholy practice. If a person is engaged in a practice which troubles him enough to ask about it, he should discontinue it."
- Official Declaration of the First Presidency of the Church, January 5th, 1982.

"What if the person asking you to engage in something defiling is your husband, whom you love? A married couple may be tempted to introduce things into their relationship which are unworthy. Do not, as the scriptures warn, 'change the natural use into that which is against nature' (Romans 1:26). If you do, the tempter will drive a wedge between you."
- Apostle Boyd K. Packer, "The Things of the Soul," 1996, page 113.

sex teachingDon't Even Talk Dirty in Bed
"Marriage is both a commandment and an exalting principle of the gospel. Because it is ordained of God, the intimate physical expressions of married love are sacred. Yet all too commonly, these divine gifts are desecrated. If a couple allows lewd language or pornography to corrupt their intimacy, they offend their Creator while they degrade and diminish their own divine gifts. True happiness is predicated upon personal purity. Scripture commands: "Be ye clean." Marriage should ever be a covenant to lift husbands and wives to exaltation in celestial glory."

- Apostle Russell M. Nelson, "Nurturing Marriage," April 2006 General Conference

God's Moral Law Never Changes
"Doesn’t it make you deeply grateful to belong to a church with apostles and prophets at the head—knowing that one link will always hold, one light will never go out? As the world moves deeper and deeper into sin, this wonderful Church stands like a giant granite boulder."

"Aren’t you thankful to God that the apostles and prophets never waver on sin? No matter how strong the winds of public opinion may blow, the Church is immovable."

"Those who espouse perverse principles and deviant behavior are living in sin. Consenting adults that teach contrary to the gospel are wrong even if the majority accepts them. Sin is sin, and that is God’s truth."
- Apostle Vaughn J. Featherstone, “Carry the Torch,” October 1999 General Conference, also New Era, Mar. 2001, page 40


Mormons who think oral sex is okay in the sight of Heavenly Father are just deceiving themselves.

From the October 2003 Ensign Magazine:

Touch not their unclean things. Too many Latter-day Saints today somehow believe they can stand with one hand touching the walls of the temple while the other hand fondles the unclean things of the world. We can’t do that. As Alma said, “Touch not their unclean things” (Alma 5:57). I plead with you, put both hands on the temple. Put your arms around the temple, and hang on for dear life to your family dream. If you don’t, the tigers will come at night and tear your dreams apart."

" your profound respect for that love—and for the doctrines about eternal love and family life—by bridling your passions. Don’t be deceived by the false idea that anything short of the sex act itself is okay. That is a lie, not only because one step overpoweringly leads to another, but because even touching another person’s body with sexual intent is part of the intimacy that is kept holy by the sanctuary of chastity. Please also beware of unnatural sexual acts that are just as immoral, if not worse, than traditional fornication or adultery."
- Elder Bruce C. Hafen, “Your Longing for Family Joy,” Ensign, Oct. 2003, page 28

"Unfortunately, some married couples fail to realize that sexual experiences were never intended by the Lord to be a mere plaything or merely to satisfy passions and lusts. When couples engage in physical intimacy devoid of emotional and spiritual intimacy, or when they participate in unholy practices, what should be a spiritually bonding element in their marriage may actually become a disruptive force. Going to the scriptures and to the words of modern prophets for inspired counsel is one of the best ways husbands and wives can improve their communication and strengthen their marriage.
- Elder Spencer J. Condie, “Finding Marital Unity through the Scriptures,” Ensign, Jul 1986, page 52

The recent statements above mirror the official church declaration against oral sex, which was signed by the First Presidency - including Gordon B. Hinckley:

gordon_hinkcley"Married persons should understand that if in their marital relations they are guilty of unnatural, impure, or unholy practices, they should not enter the temple unless and until they repent and discontinue any such practices. Husbands and wives who are aware of these requirements can determine by themselves their standing before the Lord."

"All of this should be conveyed without having priesthood leaders focus upon intimate matters which are a part of husband and wife relationships. Skillful interviewing and counseling can occur without discussion of clinical details by placing firm responsibility on individual members of the Church to put their lives in order before exercising the privilege of entering a house of the Lord. The First Presidency [including Gordon B. Hinckley] has interpreted oral sex as constituting an unnatural, impure, or unholy practice. If a person is engaged in a practice which troubles him enough to ask about it, he should discontinue it."
- Official Declaration of the First Presidency of the Church - Including Gordon B. Hinckley, January 5th, 1982
See a photocopy of the letter here: PAGE 1 - PAGE 2

In a letter responding to an inquiry from a married couple asking if oral sex was permitted, the late church Presient and Prophet Harold B. Lee stated:

prophet-oral-sex "I was shocked to have you raise the question about `oral lovemaking in the genital area among married couples.' Heaven forbid any such degrading activities which would be abhorrent in the sight of the Lord. For any Latter-day Saint... to engage in any kind of perversions of this sacred God-given gift of procreation would be sure to bring down the condemnation of the Lord whom we would offend were we to engage in any such practice."
- Church President Harold B. Lee,

The church has also condemned "unatural" sexual acts in marriage:

kimball-sex"Sexual relations in marriage are not unrestrained. Even though sex can be an important and satisfactory part of married life, we must remember that life is not designed just for sex. Even marriage does not make proper certain extremes in sexual indulgence. To the Ephesian saints Paul begged for propriety in marriage: "So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself." (Ephesians 5:28.) And the Lord's condemnation included secret sexual sins in marriage, when he said: "And those who are not pure, and have said they were pure, shall be destroyed, saith the Lord God." (D&C 132:52)"

"If it is unnatural, you just don't do it. That is all, and all the family life should be kept clean and worthy and on a very high plane. There are some people who have said that behind the bedroom doors anything goes. That is not true and the Lord would not condone it."
- President Spencer W. Kimball, The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, p.311-12

morman marriage intimacy"Physical intimacy is not only a symbolic union between a husband and a wife—the very uniting of their souls—but it is also symbolic of a shared relationship between them and their Father in Heaven. He is immortal and perfect. We are mortal and imperfect. Nevertheless we seek ways even in mortality whereby we can unite with Him spiritually. In so doing we gain some access to both the grace and the majesty of His power. These are moments when we quite literally unite our will with God’s will, our spirit with His spirit, where communion through the veil becomes very real. At such moments we not only acknowledge His divinity but we quite literally take something of that divinity to ourselves."

"Please, never say: “Who does it hurt? Why not a little freedom? “Flee fornication,” Paul cries, and flee “anything like unto it,” the Doctrine and Covenants adds. The body is something to be kept pure and holy. Do not be afraid of soiling its hands in honest labor. Do not be afraid of scars that may come in defending the truth or fighting for the right, but beware scars that spiritually disfigure, that come to you in activities you should not have undertaken."
- Apostle Jeffrey R. Holland, “Personal Purity,” Ensign, Nov 1998, page 75

howard-hunter“Tenderness and respect—never selfishness—must be the guiding principles in the intimate relationship between husband and wife. Each partner must be considerate and sensitive to the other’s needs and desires. Any domineering, indecent, or uncontrolled behavior in the intimate relationship between husband and wife is condemned by the Lord. Pornography and unwholesome fantasies erode one’s character and strike at the foundation of a happy marriage.”
- The Prophet Howard W. Hunter, “Being a Righteous Husband and Father,” Ensign, Nov. 1994, page 50

Local church leaders have been encouraged not to ask married couples about their sexual practices. However, the chuch has not changed its position that oral sex is an "unnatural, impure, or unholy practice" and therefore it is prohibited under the covenant made in the temple to abstain from all "unnatural, impure, or unholy practices."

No Questioning of Church Stand Against Oral Sex

"Some Church members may have reservations because of a physical appetite they are not quite willing to surrender."

"Some members are constantly evaluating the gospel by the standards of the world. They may think, 'That is not how I think the Lord would want it done,' or, 'Based on my understanding of the scriptures, the Church position should have been . . .'”

"Other common reservations are flagged by words such as 'yes, but . . .' when scriptures or prophets are quoted. Or we may hear, 'I am not going to let the Church make my decisions for me.'"

"For us, to 'believe all things' means to believe the doctrine of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ as well as the words of the Latterday prophets. It means to successfully erase our doubts and reservations. It means that in making spiritual commitments, we are prepared to hold nothing back. It means we are ready to consecrate our lives to the work of the kingdom."

"Unquestioning obedience to the Lord indicates that a person has developed faith and trust in Him to the point where he or she considers all inspired instruction — whether it be recorded scripture or the words of modern prophets — to be worthy of obedience."

"Let us believe all things. Let us have unquestioning faith in all of the doctrines and truths of the restored gospel."
- Elder Robert Oaks, "Believe All Things" Church Ensign, July 2005, page 30

"Have we been careless? Have we drifted far too much in the direction of the world's view, which is so saturated with Lucifer's lies about physical intimacy? It is indeed time to rise up and be careful! Careful about everything that comes into our hearts, minds, and homes which pertains to physical intimacy. Could the words of the Prophet Joseph Smith apply to how in times past we have carelessly thought about, and talked about, physical intimacy? Joseph said: 'How vain and trifling have been our spirits, our conferences, our councils, our meetings, our private as well as public conversations—too low, too mean, too vulgar, too condescending.' We must be very careful with our language and our conversations about everything related to this sacred physical endowment."

"The Lord blesses spouses who love each other purely. I believe He blesses spouses whose passions and appetites have been influenced by the Holy Ghost. We were given the gift of the Holy Ghost for exactly such a time as this. Is it difficult to believe that the Holy Ghost will help you express your love physically? He will. Pray for it."
- "Personal Purity and Intimacy" by Sister Wendy Watson, 1999 Women's Conference

Note: According to a recent Discovery Health Network/Berman and Berman poll, 63% of all adult men and women wish they had oral sex more frequently, while nearly the same percentage (60%) indicate that giving and receiving oral sex is their favorite sexual behavior.

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